What is the protocol for how divorced/separated people speak about their former spouses in public spaces? I am still not sure. Recently I unfollowed a divorce blog that I used to enjoy when I found myself becoming increasingly irritated by how the author wrote about her ex-husband. Her blog was written under a pseudonym, yet carried photos of her and her children and stories of her neighbourhood which would have made it quite easy to identify the ex that she complained bitterly about; how difficult he was, how much the kids hated him, how careless he was of her feelings.
Whatever we feel about our exes, ranting about them online in a manner that gives them no right to reply just seems so unfair. I was the subject of someone's not-very-disguised blog posts some time back and felt deeply hurt by the descriptions of actions that were supposedly mine, but even more hurt by the comments of this person's friends, who most definitely hadn't heard my side of the story.
So what I mean to say is this: I will never write in this blog about my ex-husband because it's not right or fair and I wouldn't like if he wrote about me.
I agree.
ReplyDeleteWhen something is put forth online, you have every right to reply. Sometimes you choose not to. That's different.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, and I speak from my own experiences here, the person I am in my own private reflections is not how the rest of the world views me.
When a friend of a friend states their opinion, they do so out of loyalty. Also because my side of the story stays with me. Sometimes I've chosen to speak to them about it. It usually serves me well.